I've decided to finally keep an online journal because I love to express my thoughts and feelings through writing/typing and I would love to share them with people I care about... Not really! LOL I just made myself sound serious and thought provoking didn't I? LOL 

Actually I got the idea from my friend Ro. I like her blog so I just wanted to keep one of my own due to boredom and it seemed like a good idea to start one last night. As you can see the title is "Zee Deveel", one of my favorite songs by Incubus about people letting money and materialism run their lives. It's just a catchy word and it always reminds me to not let money become a prime factor in my life.

As most of you know it's Septemeber 11th. If you don't know the significance in that then you have either been living under a rock for the past 3 years or you are a complete idiot LOL. Alot of people have told me that they don't want to hear about 9/11 or they just try not to think about much anymore and I see why, but that day will always be important because of the fear I felt when it happened.

I was in my 8th grade science class when a teacher down the hall knocked on my teachers door and wispered something to her. My teacher then just sadly yelled "Oh my God, I don't even want to watch it [television]." So as the nosy students we were we asked her what happened and she said the World Trade Centers had been attacked. Now I had no idea what the WTC was... I only knew them as the "Twin Towers" but once she turned on the t.v. I saw. I think right when she turned the t.v. on, the second plane had hit, I'm not really sure because I saw the footage so many times I forgot if I saw it when it really happened or not. I was so confused because everyone was saying it was a terroist attack and I kept thinking "how do you know maybe the pilot lost control and it was an accident" (naive child I was) but once the second one hit I understood... and then freaked out! My brother went to NYU then and his dorm was right behind the towers so once I saw all the flames and derbris I cried because I thought something bad happened to him.

That entire day, I convinced all my teachers to keep the t.v.'s on so I could see what was happening. All these worst case senarios kept playing in my head and when I got home my mom said she had been trying to call my brother all day but got no answer. That is one of the most scariest things to experienced.  Fear that someone you love so much is gone just like that. All day I watched the coverage on 9/11 and cried. Cried for my brother, all of those families, New York, and the towers. Finally around about 5pm my brother called my mom and said he was alright. Luckily his dorm didn't get effcted but he wasn't on campus that day anyway. That was one of the most relieving things ever. To have my brother call and just say that he was alright, you guys don't know the happiness I felt. Since then my bond with my brother has gotten stronger and stronger and I can't see myself being the person I am without him. 9/11 was  a horrific and sad day for everyone and those who say things like "It's over, get over it" don't know the true feeling of horror when it happened.

That was the day I decided to re-evaluate my life and not take things for granted and we all should because even though it sounds cliche, you never know when a tragedy can take away everything or anyone you love.